Cheesespread Panic

Time: Oct. 30 7 p.m.
Place: Ernie Pyle Hall, IU Bloomington, Ind.

All I wanted was a chicken sandwich for dinner.
Hence, I utilized an apparatus for transmission of speech to a distant point - telephone, as Germans might call it, to order food items from a restaurant.
The coversation with the chripy single who took my call went something like this:

Chick (pun INTENDED) who answered phone: Hi, can I take your order?
Harold McDarling (my pen name. pun INTENDED): Yes, this is for takeout.
CWAP: What can I get you?
HM: -
HM: -
HM: (starts laughing maniacally, thrusting phone toward confused and unassuming friends nearby)


This is a fine illustration of the phenomenon legitimized by Charles Darwin: order panic.

Often, food seekers experience a minor stroke whilst ordering over a telephone, sometimes resulting in a hang up, other times a perpetually hungry belly.

Luckily, Darwin proposed in his analytical works "The Descent of Delivery" a solution for order panic attacks:

Merely keep in mind that the person taking your order is probably poor and/or ugly.



I got my chicken sandwich.
Get yours.