Much ado about muffin

Dear Food Bloggers,

Why do muffin bottoms exist? The muffin top is clearly the more delicious part of the muffin. It is more moist, more flavorful and it is not separated from my mouth by a layer of cooked paper. Why is it that the muffin bottom is so gross and dry and crumbly? Why don't bakeries offer a stack of muffin tops? I'm pretty sure that a coffee shop in my hometown - the name of which I will not divulge except to say that it rhymes with Farrah Mote - offers muffin tops without their redheaded stepchild known as the muffin bottom. How do we get other eateries to jump on the muffin top bandwagon? Protests? Letters? Doing nothing and hoping the problem fixes itself? Any advice you could offer would be greatly appreciated.

Sincerely,

Topped Off


Dear Topped Off,

This problem of "muffin bottoms" will cease as soon as you put your Seinfeld DVDs back in their box.


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