Starbrunch

This morning I discovered Starbucks' breakfast sandwiches.

The coffee queen added the eggy treats to its menu months ago. As an infrequent visitor, I felt indifferent about the menu expansion despite my love of traditional breakfast breads stuffed with salty meats and chicken embryos.

And when the emo cashier with cheap highlights presented my order this morning, I was initally surprised that the cheesy concoction overtook my right hand. Its multigrain base was larger and more dense than traditional English muffins, and less informed on popular BBC sitcoms.

Sadly, its inflated size failed to correlate with better taste, but maybe that's because I ordered the most low calorie, low cholestoral and low fun breakwich on the list.

I remain ambivalent toward Starbucks breakfast sandwiches. On the other hand, the iced coffee that supplemented my mediocre egg patty proved a refreshing and delicious five dollar treat.

I've neither the desire nor the means to purchase Starbucks' beans every day. But do you know what I do have the desire and the means to do? Eat your family.