Are you a good witch or a sandwich?

Dear Food Blog,

How do you make the perfect sandwich?

-The Sand Witch


Dear Sand Witch,

The art of making the perfect sandwich is really an act of self love. But I’m getting ahead of myself. Sandwiches have been the talk of the nation since Esquire published its article on The Best Sandwiches in America. (And those sandwiches were subsequently served in the Hearst cafeteria this week.)

A lot of people err in making the right sandwich by just slapping things onto bread and hoping for the best. American cheese, abusive relationships, cocaine—none of this belongs on a sandwich, stupid.

When you start respecting yourself, then, and only then can you make a sandwich that’s truly delicious and satisfying. Fresh, soft whole grain honey white bread, turkey, swiss, dijon mustard, tomatoes, pepper, and a drop of vinegar—these items make one sweet, forbidden symphony of a sandwich.

Also, please release Princess Sparkle from your sandy, dessert lair.

Love,
The Food Bloggers

Do you have a question about food? Email us! thisisafoodblog@gmail.com