Thursday, March 20, 2008

Two kinds of jerky

Editor's note: If you're a dude, this entry might make your brain explode.

Eating preserved meat is like having a friend that sells Mary Kay.

At first, eating the meat is as enjoyable and delicious-tasting as the Mary Kay "events" are fun and inviting.

But a couple dozen chews or minutes in, you want out.

Because you realize that the meat's tragic saltiness and pungent after-taste will linger on your tongue for hours, just as you realize the cosmetics distributor is OK with poking at your self-esteem to get inside your wallet.

More disturbingly, you realize the quality of the dehydrated meat is not unlike the character of the deeply powdered friend -- pretty low.

And before you know it, there you are: stuck with an unquenchable thirst, and 12-dollar plum lip gloss.

4 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Lay off my beef, jerky! Camping. hot tubs. the zoo. What do they have in common? herky jerky time. Thick steak meat is best. You get what you pay for. No Slim Jims Please!

11:42 AM  
Blogger Michelle said...

Actually, I love Slim Jims. Always have.

12:23 PM  
Blogger Joanna said...

I like slim jims too, despite their disturbing ad campaign of the early aughts.

12:38 PM  
Blogger Kacie said...

Lololol. That's all I have to say

2:53 PM  

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