Butter, sweat and tears

I don't know if you missed this week's hot NYT's article on Butter. The gist of it is, "Your holiday baking turns out terrible every year because you're a moron. And you might as well kill yourself if you don't start using butter correctly." Unlike one source, I can't say my cookies have ever turned out so poorly it made me cry. Making cookies would only make me cry if they came to life and then fought a bloody civil war against each other until they were all dead. But I did learn from the Times that butter is full of "secrets," not unlike a woman's heart. I also learned that once you melt it, you've basically rendered it worthless as an ingredient. This faux pas I've committed!

Today the food blog recommends...

eating five coconut popsicles in one sitting.  Not that I've done that. OK I have. And it was the right thing to do.

Breaking breakfast

If you've ever seen the pilot of Arrested Development or had a mom, you may agree that "breakfast is the most important meal of the day" is a ubiquitous ideal.

If you are literate, you may have encountered one of what seems like dozens of scientific studies proving that, hey, b-fast does a lotta good for our brains and our hot asses. Indeed, there are plenty of physiological (and taste buddal!) reasons to leggo my eggo and eat it.

We get it. Eating in the morning is good for us.

So why am I still reading about VERY IMPORTANT studies emphasizing this established concept?

On Tuesday, a New York Times' health blogger posted information about a study among more than 2,000 pimply adolescents in Minnesota. Results: the fatties didn't eat breakfast. NOT BREAKING NEWS!!!!

In April's Good Housekeeping mag (FU, my mom subscribes. FU, yes I live at home still. FU, it's free for me. FU, yes I feel defensive about it.) one of the SUPER helpful tips to "supercharge your metabolism" is, whaddya know, a "hearty breakfast." NOT CRAZY FRESH REPORTING!!!!

So media criticism aside, we freagin know not to delay our seven bowls of Cocoa Puffs for after dinner. And -- hey scientists, how about focusing your magical brains on something else now? AIDS cure? Soap that smells like cole slaw?